Ever Met one of those Know It All Bakers.....

Discussion in 'Baker Banter' started by Shellyann36, Aug 29, 2013.

  1. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    Well perhaps the title is misleading. The kind of baker I am speaking of is the kind that can always out bake everyone around them and is easy to find fault of someone elses baked items. My SIL is like this. She has taken it upon herself to be the family baker and she does not like to share the spotlight with anyone who has the nerve to bake anything for any of the family functions. She has literally turned up her nose and said "hmp" about one of my cakes once. I was shocked and mad at first. After a while I cooled down and it actually made me laugh that she was like that. Have you ever faced one of these bakers? The kind that knows everything and can bake circles around you? Do share your stories please.
     
    Shellyann36, Aug 29, 2013
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    Babble64 Well-Known Member

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    I don't know that I've ever had anyone be so boldly insulting as that, but I do know a couple of people who feel the need to "one up" you. I have such a different attitude toward people like this these days. I absolutely know that a person like that is feeling insecure in some way, inside. The baking snobbery is her way of trying to find security. Sad that in order to do that she has to put others down. I'm glad that you found a way to make light of the situation and not take her struggle on as your own. Keep on baking, baking sister; I'm guessing many, many people are completely loving your talent for it and the results of your labor!!

    As for people who really can bake circles around me, I have just decided I can do my best, and that's that. There will always be someone who can outdo me at anything I try. Rather than making myself crazy, or just giving up in defeat, I recognize that what I do makes me happy and others happy and I carry on, doing MY best.

    Baking as a life lesson: who knew? Thanks for the post Shellyann36!
     
    Babble64, Aug 29, 2013
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    ACSAPA Well-Known Member

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    I don't feel in competition with the bakers I know.
    I know a couple of people who can bake a lot better than me, but I'm a better artist than them. So I don't feel like I have to beat them at baking.
    I'm not a serious artisan baker anyway, I sometimes use shortcuts like store bought pie crust.
     
    ACSAPA, Aug 29, 2013
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  4. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    Yes it is probably a superiority struggle within herself. I know that her sister is a better cook than her and I think that it hurts her feelings when her sister's foods are praised more than her own are. I just shrug it off and go with it. I rarely bake for their family functions anymore. If they are having a function I ask what do I need to bring or do you want anything? I don't just go right out and volunteer a particular item anymore.

    Life lessons in baking is very correct!
     
    Shellyann36, Aug 31, 2013
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  5. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    I think that it is just my SIL's persona. She is by far not an artisan baker either but her attitude would suggest otherwise. I just let it slide and continue to do what I do at home and I don't offer baked items at their family get togethers any longer. I will just ask if they need me to bring anything and I let them decide what they need.
     
    Shellyann36, Aug 31, 2013
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    cefmac Well-Known Member

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    One of my best friends is like that. She doesn't object to anyone else's baking as such, but she bakes so often and always brings her baking to when we meet up as a group, so I kind of feel like it's become "her" thing. We often have dinner parties as well and she's even worse when it comes to cooking - she loves to cook so much that she won't let anyone else plan the meal or make it.
     
    cefmac, Sep 1, 2013
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    mommy42 Well-Known Member

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    WOW! That would be weird! I don't think I've ever encountered someone who was a baking "snob"!!! Maybe in other areas of life where they try to one up you in everything from athletics, to how great their kids are - but never baking! I'm not the worlds greatest baker but sometimes I think my baking is better than my cooking!!! But, no one has died at my table yet, so I guess that is a good thing!!! LOL

    I agree it is insecurities on their part. And who knows, maybe in their life it was the only thing they were good at so they hold on to it for dear life!! It is good that those of you that were "snubbed" kept your heads up and saw through the "charade"!!! :)
     
    mommy42, Sep 1, 2013
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    Becky Well-Known Member

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    Wow that is really rude of her! I often think that people who put other people down like that often do so because of low self-esteem (even if they seem outwardly confident) - criticising others makes them feel superior and therefore better about themselves... not really acceptable though!

    I always think that if you are good at something, then it's nice to share that skill because it makes other people happy. It's a shame she feels the need to put others down as well!
     
    Becky, Sep 2, 2013
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  9. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    Now she seems like she is very much into it all. I say less work for you and the rest of your friends. I guess it does get annoying at times though.
     
    Shellyann36, Sep 3, 2013
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  10. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    Yes I agree with both of you. I think it is because she is insecure and has to be superior in one form or another. I know that the rest of her family thinks that her sister is the better cook between the two of them and they often rely on her to prepared the meats and sides for the family meals. I guess she just has to get her good baking in to compete. It does not bother me as much anymore. I just let it slide and it is one less thing that I have to take.
     
    Shellyann36, Sep 3, 2013
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    OhioTom76 Well-Known Member

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    Sort of, my sister is a control freak and always has to monopolize every family get together with "her own" cooking. Problem is, she can't cook. She doesn't even want anyone else's side dishes or other food taking up space in the fridge or the oven or the table, and starts complaining. It's gotten worse over the years, as she doesn't like turkey - so apparently nobody else in the house is allowed to have turkey either for Thanksgiving.
     
    OhioTom76, Oct 4, 2013
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    Preya_M Well-Known Member

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    My aunt is like that. I baked her a cheesecake to show my appreciation because she came over for a visit (she lives in another country). I presented her the cake with a strawberry and whipped cream. My cousins enjoyed it and so did my grandma, but my aunt was criticizing it, saying that it was too heavy and she didn't eat it. I believe that everyone has a different style of cooking. There is no one recipe that we follow to create the perfect treat. If it is something that we are pleased with, then I frankly don't care what others say about it. But it was heartbreaking to hear my own aunt say that.
     
    Preya_M, Oct 5, 2013
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    Babble64 Well-Known Member

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    I had this thread on my mind yesterday as I baked biscuits for a church gathering. I knew another friend, who is a wonderful cake maker/decorator, had also signed up to bring biscuits. Of course that had me thinking that everyone would like her biscuits better, even though I often get compliments on mine. It helped immensely that this woman is a sweet lady, and would be the last to criticize someone else's efforts. But it made me sad that I even had to consider that. It just reinforces my thoughts about how so much of this has to do with our insecurities. A person who is comfortable with who they are on the inside wouldn't criticize someone else's efforts, even if they weren't as talented.
     
    Babble64, Oct 5, 2013
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    Christine Mlinek Well-Known Member

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    unfortunately, I know of one like this. . Some people don't know how to be happy I guess.
     
    Christine Mlinek, Oct 18, 2013
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  15. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    Ouch Tom that is horrible. I guess if her cooking was all that great it might not be so bad letting her run the show but if she can't cook what is everyone suppose to eat? I hate it when a family member holds holidays and special occasions hostage in the kitchen! What have you done about the turkey dilema? I am not a huge fan of turkey but I at least want it on Thanksgiving.

    Oh Preya I am so sorry to hear this. There was no need to hurt your feelings. Shame on your aunt!
     
    Shellyann36, Nov 1, 2013
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  16. Shellyann36

    Shellyann36 Well-Known Member

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    This is very true Babble64. Someone who is secure does not need to criticize anyone. I am sure your biscuits turned out wonderfully!

    Yes it seems that they have to bring everyone else down to their level. So sad.
     
    Shellyann36, Nov 1, 2013
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    Christine Mlinek Well-Known Member

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    It truly is sad Shellyann, This one individual went so far as to try and stalk another person because she didn't like what was said on another baking forum. I mean, seriously, no growing up from high school yet? Come on.... no one is better than anyone, we all have our own different tastes, preferences, but one method of baking does not make one an expert or so high and mighty - that is why I came here..... so far, no one is rude or nasty and that is a good thing!
    Everyone here seems so nice and helpful.....
     
    Christine Mlinek, Nov 1, 2013
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    Annette Well-Known Member

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    My twin sister is like that. She likes to say that her baking is better than mine because she is always the one who gets to bake during the holidays. I use to bake the pies and everyone else loved them and said they were really good. She said they were alright. Talk about mean.
     
    Annette, Nov 1, 2013
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    dandeliion Well-Known Member

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    Yes, my mother is like that lol. When I was in high school I took pastry classes at a local community college (I ditched a lot of school and needed the credits to graduate ha.) and my mother enrolled with me to ensure that I actually went and oh lord was that obnoxious. She was the oldest one in the class and constantly "corrected" the teacher and other students... it was mortifying haha. And I never lived down getting a B+ in the course while she got an A.
     
    dandeliion, Nov 2, 2013
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    Annette Well-Known Member

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    Wow she gets an A and you get a B+. That's funny .
     
    Annette, Nov 2, 2013
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